The Best Movie Lines Ever?
Millie Jefferson
FEBRUARY 23, 2008
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Weekend America asked you for your most memorable movie lines. And you responded in force. Read some of the best movie lines ever as determined by you, our listeners.
I do like Tater Tots.
-Clint Eastwood in "A Perfect World"
O Ci
Los Angeles, Calif.
***
Damn, ma, I got my head gear on.
-Anthony Michael Hall, "Sixteen Candles"
Maria Kauffman
Woddbridge, Va.
***
These go to 11.
-Christoper Guest, "This Is Spinal Tap"
Kaarli Makela
Cleveland, Ohio
***
The whole point of the Doomsday Machine is lost if you keep it a secret!
-Peter Sellers, Dr. Strangelove
Dan Epstein
Chicago, Ill.
***
Are you an assassin?
I'm a soldier.
You're neither. You're an errand boy, sent by grocery clerks, to collect a bill.
-Marlon Brando and Martin Sheen, "Apocalypse Now"
Ted Faulhaber
Des Peres, Mo.
***
We all are [on our way out]. Act accordingly.
-Jack Nicholson, "The Departed"
Krista Bledsoe
Lakeland, Fla.
***
Damn, baby! What'd you do to your hair?
Orlando, you like it? It's Autumn Sunrise.
-Whoopi Goldberg, "Ghost"
Selina Bart-Plange
New York, N.Y.
***
Run for it, Marty!
-Christopher Lloyd, "Back to the Future"
Nathan Thornton
Columbus, Ohio
***
We've had many top nights ...
-Wayne Hope, "The Castle"
Naomi Tsujimura
Raleigh, N.C.
***
Failure should never lead to despair, for despair looks only to the past ... in business, and in love.
The future is now.
-Charles Durning, "The Hudsucker Proxy"
Michael Frank
Columbia, S.C.
***
If you knew how much I love you, you'd faint.
-Joel McCrea, "Foreign Correspondent"
Gary Pilcher
Canfield, Ohio
***
Christmas means carnage!
-Danny Mann, "Babe"
Patty Trimmer
Oberlin, Ohio
***
Hey. If any of you are looking for any last-minute gift ideas for me, I have one. I'd like Frank Shirley, my boss, right here tonight. I want him brought from his happy holiday slumber over there on Melody Lane with all the other rich people and I want him brought right here, with a big ribbon on his head. And I want to look him straight in the eye and I want to tell him what a cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, dickless, hopeless, heartless, fat-ass, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed sack of monkey shit he is. Hallelujah. Holy shit. Where's the Tylenol?
-Chevy Chase, "Christmas Vacation"
Jamie Lewis
Woodland Hills, Calif.
***
This one time, at band camp ...
-Alyson Hannigan, "American Pie"
Adrienne Smith
Lemoore, Calif.
***
Double or nothing.
-Omar Epps, "Love and Basketball"
Melanie Ragland
Chicago, Ill.
***
You will suffer me!
-Viggo Mortensen, "The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King"
Marla Blaire
Los Angeles, Calif.
***
I'm poor, black, I may even be ugly, but dear God I'm here, I'm here!
-Whoopi Goldberg, "The Color Purple"
J. Darden
Oakland, Calif.
***
What we've got here is failure to communicate.
-Strother Martin, "Cool Hand Luke"
Richard Jordan
Gasonia, N.C.
and
Charlotte Fleming
Orlando, Fla.
***
That's the bravest thing I've ever seen a vegetable do.
-George Clooney, "Return of the Killer Tomatoes"
C.J. Dillion
Valparaiso, Ind.
***
Bring out your dead.
-Eric Idle, "Monty Python and the Holy Grail"
***
Shall I alert the media?
-John Guilgud, "Arthur"
Kathy Terpstra
Rochester, Minn.
***
H.I., you're young and you got your health, what you want with a job?
-William Forsythe, "Raising Arizona"
Glenn Itano
Alameda, Calif.
***
I guess their TV was broke.
-Tommy Lee Jones, "No Country for Old Men"
Tom Surkamp
St. Louis, Mo.
***
Don't crush the taffeta!
-Madeline Khan, "Young Frankenstein"
Bill Panaretos
Portland, Ore.
***
Why are you being such a mega-bitch?"
Because I can be.
-Wynonna Ryder and Shannen Doherty, "Heathers"
Kurt Hoesly
Perham, Minn.
***
If I went up in blazes, there's not a living soul who would pee on me to put the fire out.
-Kathryn Hepburn, "The Lion in Winter"
Joanne Wisnosky
Raleigh, N.C.
***
I guess it comes down to a simple choice really. Get busy livin' or get busy dyin'!
-Tim Robbins, "The Shawshank Redemption"
Terry Donat
Glen Ellyn, Ill.
***
What I wouldn't give for a large sock with horse manure in it.
-Woody Allen, "Annie Hall"
James Buhler
Minneapolis, Minn.
***
Oh, my friends! My friends!
-John Hurt, "The Elephant Man"
Kim Bancroft
Sacramento, Calif.
***
Hey, I'm walkin' here!
-Dustin Hoffman, "Midnight Cowboy"
Kenny Nottingham
Anderson, Ind.
***
Either they don't know, don't show or just don't care about what goes on in the hood.
-Ice Cube, "Boyz 'N the Hood"
Ayinde Mitchell
Inglewood, Calif.
and
Keith Warlick
Oakland, Calif.
***
Ain't no Clyde Whiteman.
-Graham Greene, "Medicine River"
Al Eibel
Louisville, Ohio
***
So What's your story?
-Linda Hamilton, "Terminator 2: Judgement Day"
Roderick Mathis
Orlando, Fla.
***
If you can't work late, I can't work late.
And if I can't work late, I CAN'T WORK LATE!
-Bill Murray, "Scooged"
Mark Haas
Cleveland, Ohio
***
You sho is ugly.
-Margaret Avery, "The Color Purple"
Shivonne T.
Fontana, Calif.
***
They're not bad, they're just stupid.
-Ariana Richards, "Spaced Invaders"
Bill Brown
Murphys, Calif.
***
Balloons. Hey, do these blow up into funny shapes at all?
Well, no, unless round is funny.
-William Forsythe and Charles 'Lew' Smith, "Raising Arizona"
Terry Manier
Bend, Ore.
***
It's not that bad.
Well, I'm not saying I'd like to build a summer home here but the trees are actually quite lovely.
-Cary Elwes, "The Princess Bride"
Bill Fenstermaker
Lebanon, Pa.
***
Here's to the pencil pushers. May they all die of lead poisoning.
-Bob Hoskins, "Who Framed Roger Rabbit?"
Greg Twain
Portland, Ore.
***
Never trust a man who says "trust me."
-Louanne Stephens, "Blaze"
Cynthia Macdonald
Sacramento, Calif.
***
But how can you talk if you haven't got a brain?
I don't know, but some people without brains do an awful lot of talking, now don't they?
-Judy Garland and Ray Bolger, "The Wizard of Oz"
Mike DiDomenico
Euclid, Ohio
***
You know what I like about high school girls? Every year I get older, and they stay the same.
-Matthew McConaughey, "Dazed and Confused"
Cy Kratzer
Portland, Ore.
***
Why are you mad at me? HE'S the one who ate your father.
-Charlie Sheen, "Hot Shots!"
Kari Wiltse
St Paul, Minn.
***
Am I wrong? Dude, am I wrong?
-John Goodman, "The Big Lebowski"
Karen Scanlon
Mt. Pleasant, S.C.
***
I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take it anymore.
-Peter Finch, "Network"
Marty Newman
St. Louis, Mo.
***
[He is] a boil on the butt of humanity.
-Olympia Dukakis, "Steel Magnolias"
Kay Collins
Chicago, Ill.
***
Dave, I've still got the greatest enthusiasm and confidence in the mission.
-HAL9000, "2001: A Space Odyssey"
Roger Herrrin
Seattle, Wash.
***
I'm not even supposed to BE here today!
-Brian O'Halloran, "Clerks"
Brett Hanson
Seattle, Wash.
***
Chancho. When you are a man, sometimes you wear stretchy pants in your room. It's for fun.
-Jack Black, "Nacho Libre"
Sally MacGregor
Seattle, Wash.
***
There'll always be dancing.
-Rupert Everett, "My Best Friend's Wedding"
Martha Kight
Sacramento, Calif.
***
Who's this, your wife?
-Michael Keaton, "Night Shift"
Chris Faulhaber
Webster Groves, Mo.
***
Fish and plankton. And sea greens and protein from the sea.
-Roscoe Lee Brown, "Logan's Run"
Tim Kurkoski
Seattle, Wash.
***
When you put your hand into a bunch of goo that a moment before was your best friend's face, you'll know what to do.
-George C. Scott, "Patton"
Scott Cooper
Kirkland, Wash.
***
Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn!
-Clark Gable, "Gone With the Wind"
Susan Corrington
St. Louis, Mo.
***
There's no crying in baseball.
-Tom Hanks, "A League of Their Own"
Aja Grosvenor
Westland, Mich.
***
Refund??!! Refund!!
-Paul Dooley, "Breaking Away"
Emily Goss
Carnelian Bay, Calif.
***
Leave the gun, take the cannoli.
-Richard S. Castellano, "The Godfather"
Martin Beal
Elk Grove, Calif.
and
Caitlin Nye
Providence, R.I.
***
You're terrible, Muriel.
-Gabby Millgate, "Muriel's Wedding"
Jessica Shaw
Grand Rapids, Mich.
***
Lingerie, remember lingerie?
-Bruce Spence, "Mad Max 2: The Road Warrior"
Eric Miner
Charlotte, N.C.
***
Don't bother me I'm thinking.
-Peter Billingsley, "A Christmas Story"
Joanne Hohn
Towson, Md.
***
Shut your pie-hole!
-Robert De Niro, "This Boy's Life"
Julie Mann
Satellite Beach, Fla.
***
I'm NOT a bitch.
-Goldie Hawn, "Overboard"
Michelle Cwiekowski
Excelsior, Minn.
***
I'd take better care of my teeth.
-Grandfather, "Peggy Sue Got Married"
Janet Jones
Indian Harbour Beach, Fla.
***
The Dude abides.
-Jeff Bridges, "The Big Lebowski"
Matthew Prater
Minneapolis, Minn.
***
Do I KNOW you?
-Steve Martin, "Cheaper by the Dozen"
Greg Merritt
Rock Hill, S.C.
***
In America they call all women under the age of 50, girls.
-Katherine Hepburn, "Summertime"
Susan Saylor
Melbourne, Fla.
***
Gentlemen, you can't fight in here. This is the War Room!
-Peter Sellers, "Dr. Strangelove"
Marguerite Harvey
Minneapolis, Minn.
and
Christopher Bauleke
Minneapolis, Minn.
***
We'll make spears, long spears. Twice as long as a man!
Ah yes, but some men are longer than others.
-Mel Gibson, "Braveheart"
James Carli
Boone, N.C.
***
Never give up, never surrender!
-Tim Allen, "Galaxy Quest"
Grace Camlin
Geneva, Fla.
***
What do you think of me?
That's easy, I don't.
-Kent Smith and Gary Cooper, "The Fountainhead"
Bill Eberhard
Shaker Heights, Ohio
***
If I ever go looking for my heart's desire, I wouldn't look any further than my own backyard.
-Judy Garland, "The Wizard of Oz"
Ron Zuchora
Minneapolis, Minn.
***
And I'm gonna be 40!
-Meg Ryan, "When Harry Met Sally"
Tara Geisen
St. Paul, Minn.
***
Welcome to the party, pal.
-Bruce Willis, "Die Hard"
Keith Nielsen
St, Paul, Minn.
***
So I got that goin' for me, which is nice.
-Bill Murray, "Caddyshack"
Erin LeMere
Green Bay, Wis.
***
Oh, you don't understand, Osgood! Ehhhh... I'm a man.
Well, nobody's perfect.
-Jack Lemmon and Joe E. Brown, "Some Like It Hot"
Steve Grooms
Saint Paul, Minn.
***
Hello! My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.
-Mandy Patinkin, "The Princess Bride"
Sam Stover
Cincinnati, Ohio
***
Damn it, Valentine, you never plan ahead, you never take the long view. I mean, here it is Monday and I'm already thinking of Wednesday. It is Monday right?
-Fred Ward, "Tremors"
Steve Grooms
Saint Paul, Minn.
***
No matter where you go, there you are.
-Peter Weller, "The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension"
Scott Fagerstrom
Minneapolis, Minn.
***
Wouldn't this be a better world if insecurity and desperation made us more attractive? If needy were a turn-on?
-Albert Brooks, "Broadcast News"
Warren English
Belmont, N.C.
***
Are we to believe that boiling water soaks into a grit faster in your kitchen than in any other place on the face of the earth? Or perhaps the laws of physics cease to exist on your stove! Were they magic grits? I mean did you buy them from the same guy who sold Jack his beanstalk beans?!
-Joe Pesci, "My Cousin Vinny"
Ted Faulhaber
St. Louis, Mo.
***
I don't have to show you any stinking badges.
-Alfonso Bedoya, "The Treasure of Sierra Madre"
Don Moyes
San Gabriel, Calif.
***
I want an Oompa Loompa now!
-Julie Dawn Cole. "Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory"
Elizabeth Simmer
St. Paul, Minn.
***
I didn't ask for the anal probe.
-Nancy Mette, "Passion Fish"
Anne Coffey
Chicago Heights, Ill.
***
HHHoooo--ah!
-Al Pacino, "Scent of a Woman"
Annie Edwards-Williams
Vancouver, Wash.
***
You're killing me, Smalls!
-Patrick Renna, "The Sandlot"
Virginia Nichols
***
Hey, I've got money to spend here.
-Julia Roberts, "Pretty Woman"
Liz Harris
St. Louis, Mo.
***
Round up the usual suspects.
-Claude Rains, "Casablanca"
Dolly Joern
Mount Vernon, Wash.
***
Everybody I know's got a big 'butt.
-Paul Reubens, "Pee Wee's Big Adventure"
Sue Sauer
Minneapolis, Minn.
***
We're going to need a bigger boat.
-Roy Scheider, "Jaws"
Sue Leroux
Mendon. Vt.
***
PC Load Letter. What the f*** does that mean?
-David Herman, "Office Space"
Shawna T.
Houston, Texas
***
You had me at hello.
-Renee Zellweger, "Jerry Maguire"
Xio Moncada
Los Angeles, Calif.
***
I'll tell you in another life, when we are both cats.
-Penelope Cruz, "Vanilla Sky"
Malik Basurto
Northridge, Calif.
Comments
Comment | Refresh
07/24/2014
LL
06/24/2014
FG
06/23/2014
YJ
06/09/2014
Madelyn Kahl said: "It's twue, it's twue" in Blazzing Saddles.
From New york, NY, 03/24/2011
Don't call me Shirly.
From New york, NY, 03/24/2011
Don't call me Shirly.
05/21/2010
My 2 favorite movie quotes:
"I'm not arguing that with you!" said by Dan Hedaya in Joe versus the Volcano and "Are you Joe?!" said by Abe Vigoda, same film
02/06/2010
High School Musical 3 has THE BEST lines! But these are the top three:
3) I love you, Wildcat.
2) ...the one who inspired my heart
1) My prom is wherever you are
From Syracuse, NY, 04/02/2009
"putting on the foil..!" Hanson brothers from Slapshot
From plantation, FL, 01/23/2009
Just because a man in a big red coat give u a sword it doesnt make u a hero
Cronicals of Narnia
From Laredo, TX, 09/10/2008
"I never did mind about the little things" Movie: Point of no return
From Sacramento, CA, 08/21/2008
"Fasten your seatbelts, it's going to be a bumpy night!" Margo Chandler as played by Bette Davis in "All About Eve" Love this movie. So well written
From Hilo, HI, 08/10/2008
Where is "TONIGHT, WE DINE IN HELL!" or "SPARTANS, PREPARE FOR GLORY!!!"?
The list of epic Leonidas-lines goes on, but how can we forget the Spartans and their six-packs?
06/20/2008
Really late comment--just ran across the site--the line from "My Best Friend's Wedding" is said by Julia Robert's gay friend Rupert Everett as he sweeps her onto the dance floor after the Dermot Mulroney character she's lost has left for the honeymoon.
03/27/2008
KALIFORNIA
Adell-"Brian, you look good with a gun."
From thousand oaks, CA, 03/10/2008
It was not Olympia Dukakis who said "he is a boil on the butt of humanity" It was Shirley MacLaine. She said it about the Tom Skerrit character. One of Olympia's immortal lines is from MOONSTRUCK. "Your life's going down the toilet"...referring to Cher. Another great line of hers from STEEL MAGNOLIAS was "What distinguishes us from the animals is our ability to accessorize" I ought to know...I'm her brother!
From St. Louis, 02/27/2008
One of my all-time favorites comes from Christmas Vacation, which we watch every Holiday season:
Clark Griswold's arrogant boss, Frank Shirley, played Brian Doyle-Murray, picks up the his office telephone and says: "Get me somebody. Anybody. And get me somebody while I'm waiting!"
From St. Paul, MN, 02/26/2008
Two of my favorites are both spoken by John Wayne. 1. In True Grit, as Rooster Coburn, he responds to a taunt by the character played by Robert Duvall by saying, "Fill your hand, you son-of-a-bitch." Then he takes the reins of his horse in his teeth, draws his pistol and rifle, and puts the spurs in to charge across the clearing. 2. As a character named Quirt Jones, in 1940s Republic Pictures western the title of which I don't recall, he bluffs down some gunfighters, despite having an empty pistol. When asked afterward what would have happened had they known his pistol was empty, he replies, "It would have been Saturday night in Sioux City."
From WI, 02/26/2008
"Inconcievable"
Princess Bride
From Saint Paul, MN, 02/26/2008
Sorry that I don't know the actress's name so I can give proper credit, but my favorite line is from "Blazing Saddles"...
"It's twue, It's twue!"
From chicago, IL, 02/25/2008
from it's a wonderful life- george meets mary halfway down the stairs, takes her in his arms and asks "are you real"?
From Bloomfield Hills, MI, 02/25/2008
"I could'a been a contender"
Terry Malloy by Marlon Brando in 'On the Waterfront'
From West Liberty, IA, 02/24/2008
My favorite movie line was spoken by Patricia Neal in the movie, "Hud". When Paul Newman asked why he had never been able to seduce her, she replied: "I done my time with one cold-blooded bastard; I ain't lookin' for another!"
From St Louis, MO, 02/23/2008
Best Movie quote: "My brain, my brain....that's my second favorite organ!" Miles Monroe (Woody Allen) in Sleeper.
From Long Beach, CA, 02/23/2008
"You fell victim to one of the classic blunders! The most famous is never get involved in a land war in Asia, but only slightly less well-known is this: never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line!"
~Vizzini,
The Princess Bride
From Highland, CA, 02/23/2008
"I'll have the same thing she has." from WHEN HARRY MET SALLY.
"Nobody's perfect." from SOME LIKE IT HOT.
From Hillsdale, MI, 02/23/2008
From Moonstruck:
Olympia Dukakis: Do you love him Loretta?
Cher: Yeah, Ma, I love him awful.
Olympia Dukakis: That's too bad.
From highland, CA, 02/23/2008
From "Chinatown", J.J. Gittes: --But Mrs. Mulray, I God damn near lost my nose, and I like it. I like breathing through it. And I still think you're hiding something." Great movie.
From Ann Arbor, MI, 02/23/2008
Do I feel lucky?
-Dirty Harry.
02/23/2008
One of the best movies ever is "Dead Man" with Johnny Depp and Gary Farmer. Johnny plays a man named William Blake (not the poet) and Gary Farmer plays an Indian named named Nobody.
William Blake: Do you still have my eyeglasses?
Nobody: No, I traded them. Do you have any tobacco?
William Blake: No, I traded it.
Nobody: For what?
William Blake: I'm not telling.
Nobody: Liar.
William Blake: Thief.
And to add to that, three untrustworthy bounty hunters are following them, one named Conway Twill.
Conway Twill: I'll tell you one thing: if that there Blake fella keeps on shootin' marshals, I might end up liking the man!
From Boston, MA, 02/23/2008
My fav. quote
"Good times, noodle salad"
from: As Good As It Gets
From North Providence, RI, 02/23/2008
My favorite movie line is "Who ate the 'ony'" from the movie FATSO.
The line was spoken by Ann Bancroft when her brother (Dom DeLuise) came back with the birthday cake for her son, AnthONY...and her brother ate some of the cake on the way home.
From Bel Air, MD, 02/23/2008
Are my eyes really brown?
Humphrey Bogart in Casablanca
From Ypsilanti, MI, 02/23/2008
Buon giorno, principessa!
Roberto Benigni, Life is Beautiful (La Vita e bella)
From Ypsilanti, MI, 02/23/2008
My favorite movie line? "Buon giorno, principessa!" --Roberto Benigni, La Vita e Bella
From FL, 02/23/2008
1. "Use the Force, Luke!"
2. "I'll be back."
From Chicago, IL, 02/23/2008
My favorite movie lines are from "One-eyed Jacks", starring Marlon Brando and Karl Malden.
"Get up you big tub of guts."
"You're a one-eyed jack and I''e seen the other side of your face."
"I'm sneakin' by." (Marlon Brando to Karl Malden after Karl asked him how he's been after Malden deserted him and Brando was caught and imprisoned in a Mexican jail.!)
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